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Archive for the 'Emotional Reactions' Category

Overcoming Insecurity

Overcoming Insecurity and Creating Confidence Attempts to develop confidence often fail because they revolve around projecting a positive self image or achieving success.  Unfortunately these two things don’t eliminate other beliefs causing feelings of insecurity.  To Overcome the feeling of insecurity effectively it is necessary to identify and eliminate the beliefs that generate feelings of […]

Stop Beating Your Self Up

Due to an internal dialog of negative thoughts you can really beat your self up.  If the self berating thoughts are strong enough it can induce feelings of inadequacy, hopelessness, and even depression.  People often try to remedy this by willing their negative thoughts to stop.  I’ve never seen this work, and with very good […]

Self Mastery Course Results Interview

David served in the Army and National Guard. After responding to the World Trade Center and Afghanistan he came home and discovered that his emotional reactions were out of control and inappropriate. In this interview he shares how the Self Mastery course has helped him. Interview David about the Self Mastery Course Experience Podcast Audio […]

Anger Management

I don’t think we should just manage our anger.  I believe in eliminating anger.  Trying to control triggers, circumstances, and other people so we don’t become angry is too much work. It is much easier to identify and change the core beliefs causing our anger.  In this free audio podcast I outline what the process […]

Sexual Performance Anxiety

Sexual performance anxiety can cause a lot of stress in a relationhip. It creates guilt, shame, and  fears, that corrupt the emotional connection and can lead to and disconnection. In this podcast I outline what goes on in a man’s head and some of the core beliefs at the root of the issue. Sexual Performance […]

Inception and the Life of an Idea in the Mind

The Inception of an Idea.  The idea that ideas are alive has been around a long time.  Careful observation reveals that  ideas, thoughts, and beliefs behave as if they are alive in the mind.  When ideas grow and link together with other ideas they become big stories and can have multiple points of view and […]

The Most Important Thing For Your Happiness

The process of overcoming fears, identifying and changing core beliefs, dealing with emotions, meditation, being present with your emotions, and all the other myriad of steps you can take towards living a happy and fulfilling life can be overwhelming.  So sometimes it helps to take a step back and have a sense of humor about […]

Overcoming Anger Using the Self Mastery Program

I interviewed Joe who used the Self Mastery course to overcome his anger and anxiety reactions.  He’s started to be aware that some of his emotional reactions are completely gone  At other times he finds it enjoyable to experience emotions that used to be unpleasant.    He’s still working towards emotional mastery but is well on […]

Conscious Awakening

Waking up to the unconscious beliefs in your mind is an unconfortable and disconcernting realization.  Realizing your unconscious beliefs have been leading you in a dream world of unnecessary emotional reactions, and sabotaging behaviors, all based on illusions in the mind is confusing and we often react with judgment and denial.  It can also create […]

Fear Doctrine: The Creation of Anger and Agression

Fear is at the core of anger and aggression.  Yet we become so busy with the strategy of control and the act of aggression we rarely see the cause.   We can see the emotional dynamic at work whether we look at our internal thoughts, relationships, or the macro relationships of countries.   The basis if […]

Free Will

Do you have free will? Is there even such a thing as Free Will? It is true that we are to some degree products of our environment. Our minds get filled with ideas, beliefs, and emotional patterns as we grow up. We are socialized to become a collection of habits and behavior that correspond to […]

How to Tell If a Relationship Will Work

How can you tell if a relationship will work out? There are specific indicators to tell if your relationship will run into trouble down the road. The signs aren’t found in how much love, romance, or physical attraction there is. Two people can have great chemistry but still not be compatible. How to tell if […]

Don’t Take Anything Personally

How to Not Take Things Personally In the book, The Four Agreements, Miguel Ruiz outlines a code of conduct for creating love and happiness in your life. One of his Four Agreements is “Don’t Take Anything Personally. In this podcast I describe some of the hidden assumptions that cause us to take things personally. I […]

Can You Change Your Life

I often get asked if people can really change their life. They want to known if they can overcome fears, stop the judgments, and quiet the voice in their head.  The answer is yes. However, when people ask, they usually ask with such fear and doubt that almost no amount of words will suffice.  Perhaps […]

Fear of Love and Happiness

It might be hard to believe that we fear love and happiness, but it is a real dynamic that happens in the mind.  It is easier to understand if we consider the mind to be a living being with many different aspects.  If we attempt to change our beliefs and behavior, then we are making […]

Fear and Overcoming Fear

Overcome fear by gaining mastery over your core beliefs. Fear is that emotional force that drives us in a direction away from joy, happiness, and love.  Fear can paralyze us to the point that we feel helpless and suffocated.  Often fear appears irrational, but it only looks this way at the surface.  When you scrutinize the […]

Identify and Change Core Beliefs

What are core beliefs and how do you identify them? That’s what many people are realizing they need to do to change their emotional reactions. The problem is where do you look to find core beliefs? They are in the mind but can be hard to pin down, particularly when it is the mind that […]

Impeccability and Gossip

Ask Gary   Gary, A friend of mine, Alice, broke up with her boyfriend. When I talked to another friend on the phone (she also knows Alice) I told her that Alice and her boyfriend broke up. Of course I asked myself the question: why am I sharing this info with my friend?   Would this […]

Love Relationships Part II

Understanding Conflicting Desires Our body has physical desires, our emotions have a desire to express love, and our mind has a desire to have its beliefs and expectations met.  This can create some internal conflict that gets more complicated when we add another person’s desires to the mix.  The desires from the body and emotions are natural […]

Can Money Buy Happiness?

Money can buy comforts and our comforts can help keep the mind distracted from fears that eat away at our happiness.   Money doesn’t buy happiness.  Happiness is an emotional state.  From one point of view inanimate objects can’t create emotions within us.  The things money can buy does allow us to occupy our mind with things that we […]

Emotional Reactions

When it comes to stopping or changing emotional reactions people often approach the problem like they are fixing a car.  They ask, “How can I change this reaction?” or “How can I stop my jealousy, anger, frustration etc.”  The assumption seems to be that if we change one thing the whole problem will go away.  […]

The Four Agreements and Hidden Assumptions

Of don Miguel Ruiz’s Four Agreements most people will say that the hardest one to keep is Don’t Take Anything Personally.  I don’t agree.  The most challenging agreement is actually Be Impeccable with Your Word.  In taking something personal you take what someone said and express an interpretation that makes it personal.  We invest our faith in the […]

Feeling Not Good Enough – Beliefs

I wrote an article about feeling not good enough. It relates to issues of insecurity. A big component of feeling insecure is the image of perfection that we create in our mind. When the voice in our head compares us to that image of perfection it concludes that we are not good enough. Buying into […]

Judge and Victim Stories in the Mind

Hi Gary, After doing the first couple exercises that you gave us I begin to see the whole (or part of) judge-victim story. Man, how many judges and victims are there?  It is a bit overwhelming sometimes. So, my question is; is it ‘normal’ to feel a bit powerless, to think that there are just […]

Respect in Relationships

Gary, My lover consistently takes actions I feel are disrespectful and my reaction is that my desire to do loving things for her (sweet talk, flowers, even regular conversation) decreases dramatically. Q1 How do you determine whether you are withholding your love or preferring not to be disrespected? Curiously, JS The reply to this question […]

 

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The Self Mastery Course: Practical Tools for Getting Rid of the Emotional Drama in Your Life
  • Stop Emotional Reactions
  • Change Core Beliefs
  • Quiet the Criticizing Voice in Your Head
  • Develop Communication and Respect in Your Relationships
  • Create Love and Happiness in Your Life
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